Grief

Acts 20:32-38

English Standard Version (ESV)

³² And now I commend you to God and to the word of his grace, which is able to build you up and to give you the inheritance among all those who are sanctified. ³³ I coveted no one's silver or gold or apparel. ³⁴ You yourselves know that these hands ministered to my necessities and to those who were with me. ³⁵ In all things I have shown you that by working hard in this way we must help the weak and remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how he himself said, ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’”

³⁶ And when he had said these things,  he knelt down and prayed with them all. ³⁷ And there was much weeping on the part of all;  they embraced Paul and kissed him, ³⁸ being sorrowful most of all because of the word he had spoken, that they would not see his face again. And they accompanied him to the ship.

Just yesterday I attended my Aunt Geraldine’s funeral.  What a lady she was!  I will always remember how hard of a worker she was.  Whenever we went over to her house she was always busy in the kitchen or in her sewing room.  I can remember visiting her at the cleaners where she worked for years.  She was back in that hot room working away. At her funeral yesterday I heard how she worked diligently in her church just as she did at all of her jobs.  I never heard her complain about the work she had to do and I think that is because whatever she did, she did it for the Lord. 

As I read this passage today I could not help but think about Aunt Geraldine.  We grieve just as the people in this passage grieved.  Paul had told them that they would never see his face again.  I grieve because I will never see my Aunt Geraldine’s face again on this earth.  I didn’t get over to see her as much as I should have, she just lived down the street from me, but it was always a comfort to know that I could go see her.  I knew she was there and I knew I was welcome.  Now I know she is not there and I grieve.  Yet, I am so glad that she is no longer suffering but she is free.  Someday I will see her again and recognize her but for now I have memories of a lady who loved the Lord and worked hard while serving Him.  Just like Paul did, she had no idle hands nor did he. 

My Aunt Geraldine is at peace now, unlike Paul who in these verses was just beginning the worse suffering that he would experience.  He knew it and so did those who were letting him go.  So, why step into a mess?  I for one try to avoid the mess!  Paul did it for one reason only, to bring the message of salvation to all people.  He didn’t have to leave the comfort zone, he could have used the excuse that if he went these people wouldn’t have the protection from the wolves that they so desperately needed.  Yet, he went because it was the will of the Father for Him to go. 

Leaving is difficult, leaving this earth, leaving a job, or leaving a church home, leaving is the most difficult thing that we are asked to do in this life.  Yet, knowing that God has a much better plan for us, if we just continue in our faith, knowing that it is all worth it in the end, to have eternal life, no separation from the Father, is well worth the pain of today.  It was worth the pain of suffering not only for Paul but for Jesus as well.  Remember, Jesus did not want to suffer on the cross for our sins, yet He knew that was the will of the Father.  Paul didn’t want to suffer in Jerusalem, he wanted to go and spread the Gospel through preaching.  Yet both of these individuals did so for the Glory of God.  I am certain my Aunt did not want to suffer, she had a difficult life, yet she did so to bring Glory to God. 

As you seek Him may He find you faithful to the calling that He has for you.  May you have strength in times of suffering and humility in times of prosperity. 

Seeking Him with all my heart,

Sheila