Monday, February 10, 2014

Frustration and Discontent

English Standard Version (ESV)
To the choirmaster: according to (A)Lilies. Of David.
69 Save me, O God!
    For (B)the waters have come up to my neck.[a]
I sink in deep (C)mire,
    where there is no foothold;
I have come into deep waters,
    and the flood (D)sweeps over me.
(E)I am weary with my crying out;
    (F)my throat is parched.
(G)My eyes grow dim
    with (H)waiting for my God.
(I)More in number than the hairs of my head
    are (J)those who hate me (K)without cause;
mighty are those who would destroy me,
    (L)those who attack me with lies.
What I did not steal
    must I now restore?
O God, you know my folly;
    the wrongs I have done are not hidden from you.
Let not those who hope in you (M)be put to shame through me,
    O Lord God of hosts;
let not those who seek you be brought to dishonor through me,
    O God of Israel.
For it is (N)for your sake that I have borne reproach,
    that dishonor has covered my face.
I have become (O)a stranger to my brothers,
    an alien to my mother's sons.
For (P)zeal for your house has consumed me,
    and (Q)the reproaches of those who reproach you have fallen on me.
10 When I wept and humbled[b] my soul with fasting,
    it became my reproach.
11 When I made (R)sackcloth my clothing,
    I became (S)a byword to them.
12 I am the talk of those who (T)sit in the gate,
    and the drunkards make (U)songs about me.
13 But as for me, my (V)prayer is to you, O Lord.
    At (W)an acceptable time, O God,
    in the abundance of your steadfast love answer me in your saving faithfulness.
14 Deliver me
    from sinking in (X)the mire;
(Y)let me be delivered from my enemies
    and from (Z)the deep waters.
15 Let not the flood sweep over me,
    or the deep swallow me up,
    or (AA)the pit close (AB)its mouth over me.
16 Answer me, O Lord, for your (AC)steadfast love is good;
    according to your abundant (AD)mercy,(AE)turn to me.
17 (AF)Hide not your face from your servant;
    (AG)for I am in distress; (AH)make haste to answer me.
18 Draw near to my soul, redeem me;
    ransom me because of my enemies!
19 You know my (AI)reproach,
    and my shame and my dishonor;
    my foes are all known to you.
20 (AJ)Reproaches have broken my heart,
    so that I am in (AK)despair.
(AL)looked for (AM)pity, but there was none,
    and for (AN)comforters, but I found none.
21 They gave me (AO)poison for food,
    and for my thirst they gave me (AP)sour wine to drink.
22 (AQ)Let their own (AR)table before them become a snare;
    (AS)and when they are at peace, let it become a trap.[c]
23 (AT)Let their eyes be darkened, so that they cannot see,
    (AU)and make their loins tremble continually.
24 Pour out your indignation upon them,
    and let your burning anger overtake them.
25 (AV)May their camp be a desolation;
    let no one dwell in their tents.
26 For they (AW)persecute him whom (AX)you have struck down,
    and they recount the pain of (AY)those you have wounded.
27 (AZ)Add to them punishment upon punishment;
    may they have no acquittal from you.[d]
28 Let them be (BA)blotted out of the book of the living;
    let them not be (BB)enrolled among the righteous.
29 But I am afflicted and in pain;
    let your salvation, O God, (BC)set me on high!
30 I will (BD)praise the name of God with a song;
    I will (BE)magnify him with (BF)thanksgiving.
31 This will (BG)please the Lord more than an ox
    or a bull (BH)with horns and hoofs.
32 When (BI)the humble see it they will be glad;
    you who seek God, (BJ)let your hearts revive.
33 For the Lord hears the needy
    and (BK)does not despise his own people who are prisoners.
34 Let (BL)heaven and earth praise him,
    the seas and everything that moves in them.
35 For (BM)God will save Zion
    and build up the cities of Judah,
and people shall dwell there and possess it;
36     (BN)the offspring of his servants shall inherit it,
    and those who love his name shall dwell in it.

I decided to go ahead and copy the entire chapter of Psalm 69 even though it is a little long but could not see breaking this up.  Frankly, this is how I feel today.  I am struggling, ready to give up, frustrated more than ever and this is the Scripture that the Lord gives me today. 

I don’t know if my readers have ever been to the point that they feel like giving up, like they are sinking and there is not fight left in them to continue but I have.  This blog is about seeking God in all circumstances and knowing that He is there and is in control.  His ways are not our ways and sometimes I feel like they are never the same as mine.  I get frustrated, confused and discouraged way too easily because the Word tells us that He is watching, He hears our cries and He will redeem us.  As long as we live in this world life will have times of frustration and weakness but we must hold on to our faith that He will sustain us and give us hope.

Then like David we begin to want bad things to happen to those that oppose us.  As I read David’s cry I thought, I would never wish bad like that on anyone but in my own ways I do.  I want God to make it difficult on those who hurt me.  I want them to have to suffer a little if I am going to have to, not to the point of blindness or homelessness just to the point that they see they have made a bad decision.  Just like David, I trust in Him to deliver but I also want to tell Him how to do it.  When we know that He is in control, why do we still have to tell Him how to take action?  Why do I doubt?  Why do I fret?  Why do I feel discouraged? 

My prayer today is that God would give to me a sense of peace that only comes from Him.  That He would make it very clear to me the path that I should take.  If I am to be content in my current situation, then I need peace in that and if I am to push forward I need a drive and a clear vision.  Today this blog is about me, so sorry for that but I hope my struggles will encourage and not discourage you.   I want the Lord to use me in such a way that I am an inspiration to seek Him and know Him, I don’t want to be the one that turns others away from the Lord.  He is great and mighty in power, there is no one like Him now or forevermore.  Know that He is God and that He and His ways are good.

Seeking Him with all my heart,


Sheila 

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