Matthew 19:1-9
New International Version 1984
(NIV1984)
19 When Jesus had finished saying
these things, he left Galilee and went into the region of Judea to the other
side of the Jordan. 2 Large crowds followed him, and he healed them
there.
3 Some Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked, “Is it
lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?”
4 “Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning
the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ 5 and said, ‘For this
reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and
the two will become one flesh’? 6 So they are no longer two, but
one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.”
7 “Why then,” they asked, “did Moses command that a man give
his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?”
8 Jesus replied, “Moses permitted you
to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way
from the beginning. 9 I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife,
except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery.”
(http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew%2019:1%20-%209&version=NIV1984)
Divorce,
this is a subject that many try to avoid.
In our society today it has become an accepted practice and I have to
wonder if it is much like in the days of Moses when it was allowed because the
people’s hearts were hard. I believe
many hearts are being hardened these days.
There
are four things I want to look at in regard to the passage for today. 1.
Leadership 2. Unity
3. Hearts
4.
Permission.
1.
The first thing I noticed in this scripture is
that it is the man that permits the divorce.
It is the man that is to leave his family and cleave to his wife. I notice that Jesus doesn’t say that the man
and woman are too but that the man should.
I believe this was intentional as we look at the design of the man being
the leader of the home. The ultimate
responsibility is directed to the man.
We always say there are two sides to every divorce but in this passage
the responsibility lies with the man. If
the man is the head of the house anything that goes on in that house is his
responsibility. That was the design that
God made from the beginning but how many of us accept that and adhere to that
today?
2.
The
two shall become one. Those are powerful
words are they not? How do you separate
your own body? When two people are
united through Christ and they truly become one, there is nothing that can separate
them. Does becoming one mean that we
always agree with one another? If so, I
am in trouble because I don’t always agree with myself! I believe becoming one means that we respect
one another in such a way that nothing could ever separate us from each
other. I have been told that a man would
rather see the actions of respect than to be told, “I love you”. Although women like to be loved, I think
they want to be respected too. How do
you show one another respect? For men,
it may be that we women allow him to be the leader that he was designed to
be. I get disgusted at commercials and
TV shows that paint the picture of an incompetent man. My man is my source of strength and
encouragement (along with God). When he
is hurt or sick, much of my strength is gone.
I believe God designed him to be that for me. Respect for the woman is that the man sees
her and only her. That he works hard to
keep his eyes off of other woman and directed only at her. That he sees her as beautiful no matter how
fat she may get or how many wrinkles she might have. When we are one with each other, Christ needs
to be there too.
3.
I
know people who have been divorced prior to accepting Christ as their personal
Savior or who were not walking with the Lord in their marriages. They are now Christians and they are married
to Christians, living a life holy and acceptable to Him. I believe this is a beautiful thing and one
that is honored by God. Prior to being a
Christian they made decisions that were not based on the Word of God. Their hearts, although not completely
hardened were not turned towards God.
Now that they have hearts for God, the words of Jesus need to be adhered
to. I believe that their past is the
past and they need to live their lives now according to the will of the
Father. If we truly have a relationship
with the Lord and our spouse does too then I do not believe divorce will be an
option in our lives. If we are truly one
with Christ why would we divorce? Divorce
amongst those who attend church has risen over the years which concerns me and
make me wonder what we are teaching in our churches. Are we teaching how to grow in Christ? Or, how to invite God into our marriages? Are
the older women teaching the younger women how to respect their husbands as
leaders of the home? Are our men
teaching the younger men how to love their wife and how to be a good spiritual
leader in the home?
4.
When
was permission granted for divorce? When
the man’s heart was hardened. I had to
think about how Joseph was going to divorce the woman he was pledged to be
married to after she had conceived through the Holy Spirit. Joseph had a visit from an angel and his
heart was not hardened. He chose to care
for her and marry her and she gave birth to the Lord Jesus Christ. What would have happened if his heart would
have been hard?
Divorce is a difficult subject. We all know people who have been divorced and
all of their stories are different but one key theme that runs through them,
someone had a hardened heart and there was not a true communion between each
other and with the Lord. Divorce is
another sin of humans that God will forgive but it is not in His best plan for
our lives.
As you seek Him and find Him, if you
have a spouse share His love together with each other. Invite Him into your home to dwell you and
your family. For those of you who have
not yet married a few words of advice for you as well. Be sure that both of you are willing to
invite Him into your marriage. Begin that
relationship with Him together as a couple.
Then once you are married it will be a part of your lives. Be sure to keep your bodies holy refraining
from sexual intimacy until after marriage.
May God bless each and every marriage that places Him in the center of
the marriage.
Seeking Him with all my heart,
Sheila
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